Being IMPERFECT has taken me to HELL !!!! A crime that I have committed...!!!

“I'm an average girl, and sometimes I wish I could be more than that: to exceed excellence. As the days seem to go on endlessly, I await the 'someday' I've always been promised. That 'someday' when things are supposed to be perfect... the 'someday' when I find my place in this unforgiving world.”

"tomorrow never comes...the past gets in the way...I'm stuck in here today!"

Sometimes I feel like running away from here..but my thoughts of my parents always pulls me back...but circumstances..needless to say..created by me..pushes me again and again.. Am not God...am not perfect...like every other girl I'm imperfect..and will always be..I have a mind which does imperfect calculations...but people think it has to and will be working a super computer!!!! It take pressure all the time..Like in Indian langualge we call it 'faltu' (unnecessary) tensions all the time. I HATE IT when it makes 'faltu' calculations..so as to go to such an extent so as to hurt others. Seriously speaking I dont have any problem if I fall into any kind of problem which I have to handlle on my own..But it hurts the most when I realise that I've taken in someone else with me.. Don't have any words to express how I feel.. I feel that I should be punished ..punished by the ALMIGHTY above..!! In the court of law..I SHOULD BE HANGED TILL DEATH !!!

Feels disgusting at times..at myself..anger prevails and laughter vanishes from my life !! I do not like to cry..rather I hate it from the core bottom of my heart ! Disgusting...my GOD ! Feels like someone is keeping on tickling me for about many days and my hands are tied ! Feels like a ghost is around waiting to kill me...and I can't do anything else other than watch!

To the people out there I want to tell something from the core of my heart and my mind...This girl is lost, gasping for breath or supposedly dead! Never to return again...never again.. She is totally gone...! But she knows that she will not let the person within go away..She will work for others as she has been doing, but never will be doing anything for herself..nothing at all... All I want to say that I've never been untrue to anyone of you or have lied..always have tried to share everything because I considered as my own..and not to make someone jealous! otherwise I would not have said some things to you which I never should have in my whole!

And yes...one more thing, may be not the last..

IF I BREAK DOWN OR AM A BROKEN WALL..DO NOT COME TO RE BUILD ME!!!

I'M STRONG ENOUGH TO REBUILD MYSELF..AND YOU WERE RIGHT ABOUT YOUR DECISIONS OF NOT HURTING YOURSELF AND BLEED..I TRULY APPRECIATE YOUR THOUGHT!

THANKING YOU TREMENDOUSLY..